Apparently I am a bundle of emotions right now. Luke commented that he just simply does not have as many emotions as I do. I laughed then cried. Haha...just kidding...sniff. So, I am never really sure if what is circulating through my brain is reasonable or emotional.
We are under contract on an adorable little house in a neighborhood that is much, much, much cooler than I am. It isn't the charming (remodeled) bungalow (tiny, tiny house) that I was dreaming of, but it is solid, happy, will feature my henny pennies (Yay for chickens) house with a garage.
Can I even describe the angst we have just waded/are wading through? Jesus commanded: sell all you have and give the money to the poor. Crap. Jesus said: foxes have holes, but he Son of Man has no where to lay his head. Well, shoot. Jesus said: a whole lot of really hard stuff that does not really jive with (oh my goodness...just got up to mess with my rising bread (I know...hate me) and I sat back down on Sophie...will let you know when I am breathing again) buying a cute house in a popular neighborhood. (Heart is still jumping) So, I am praying and searching and asking and looking and realizing that there are not formulae for serving and loving God. When Jesus healed the blind, sometimes he spoke their healing and sometimes he made spit mud pies. Jesus is calling me and my family to serve the people in and around Asheville, NC. I still dream of feeding 5000 from my yard, but now it will just be more of a miracle. I am praying that God will heal my blindness to those in need and give me the strength to go eat with prostitutes. You know, like Jesus did.
Maybe I will even invite them over to my (barring a major problem) super cute, trendy, happy, clean (empty) house.